1. Biking into work on my hybrid it took me 4 miles before I remembered that I had a bell and didn’t need to keep calling out “On your Left” all the time.
2. When I began climbing the steep bottom section at the corner of 35th and M I discovered I no longer remembered how to get out of the saddle.
3. I need to have two T-shirts made so I can just short-circuit my inevitable replies to people’s kindly intentioned “So, how are you feeling?” T-shirt 1: “I feel like ass.” T-shirt 2: “I feel like someone else’s ass.”
4. I no longer remember what water tastes like without something added to it.
5. I don’t recognize any of my friends and team-mates unless they are wearing exercise gear.
6. I am deeply suspicious of anyone who isn’t wearing exercise gear. What are they trying to hide?
7. I’m missing pieces of my tongue from biting down hard to avoid uttering such idiocies as “It’s only a marathon” or “It’s only 80 miles.”
8. Weather days that are prostrating the rest of DC are starting to feel like just another opportunity to liquefy and become one with the atmosphere.
9. I find myself telling people that I’m doing my first Ironman. What in God’s name makes me think there will be a second?